Self-inflicted anxiety

I may be totally MIA for a lot of weeks this semester.
I really didn't think I'd have this much studying to do in my Anatomy class because I've had it all before. But come to find out, I only had some of it and the rest of it is terrifying.
Also, the tests are brutal.
So I sit for hours and days at a time memorizing dumb stuff that will not translate into my future job.

Just playing their money game.

I can't begin to describe to you how terrified I am that I won't make it to the program. We went over this before: I usually don't get my way when it comes to my life desires and plans. Why would this be any different? If I don't make it next year, I'll have to wait an ENTIRE YEAR to apply again... and what in the world will I do with my time then?! Life is ticking away, and I'm sitting in a basement.

I clearly have some anxieties here, and for good reason. People are dropping like flies from my classes, which makes me super nervous. I don't want to be next.

In other news, I had my first math test today (finally in intermediate algebra) and got 100% on it. So that's good.. but still doesn't really count since I have to pass college algebra with a certain grade.

There's just too much at stake. I feel like I'm up against too much.
What was I thinking?!